Dating 101: Courtship Isn’t Dead—Unless You Let It Be

Stop splitting the bill before he’s split the check on his own ego. Being treated like a lady isn’t “old-fashioned”—it’s the standard. The right man will show up as a gentleman and prove he’s worth keeping around.

Dating rule # 1: Stop splitting the bill before he’s split the check on his own ego. The right man will show up as a gentleman—it’s not “old-fashioned,” it’s the standard.

Now, before we go any further… yes, I’m single, I’m dating, and I’m fully aware that someone I might date one day—or their friends, family, or even their nosy neighbor—could find my blog. And that’s fine. I write as my authentic self, sharing my experiences and lessons, some of which I hope will serve my granddaughter one day. If someone doesn’t like that, chances are they’ve had the same thoughts—they just haven’t written them down for the world to see.

…to which I say: I couldn’t care less—and I mean that in the prettiest dress you’ve ever seen.

I am one of the most vulnerable, honest, open, real people you’ll ever meet—if you’re lucky enough to know me. I’m also generous, forgiving, giving to a fault, and gloriously dorky. If you don’t like me for who I am, there are about 8 billion other people on this planet who might. And that’s okay. It won’t necessarily stop me from liking you, either.

Now… back to dating.

While I haven’t always felt or dated this way, I now firmly believe this: it is the man’s job to pursue the woman. To court her. And until you’re in a committed relationship, it is also his job to pick up the tab. Period. That’s part of being a gentleman.

Ladies—sure, if you want to treat him to something small after a few dates, go for it. But in the early stage, it’s his privilege to earn your time, your company, and eventually, your heart. Offer a genuine, gracious “thank you” when he treats you—but beyond that, you don’t owe him a thing. Not your money, not your body, and not a minute more of your time than you want to give.

Once you find your Mr. Right and you’re in a real relationship, that’s when you start splitting expenses and surprising him with treats. Not a minute before.

Let him be a man. If he won’t, he’s not your man.

And one more thing—if you offer to pick up the tab early on and he lets you? Let that be your last date with him. Trust me, no real man lets a woman pay for the date while he’s courting her. I don’t care what year it is or what titles or degrees you have after your name—when you’re dating, you’re a lady. And what you want is a gentleman with manners who treats you like one.

Honey Note:

A true gentleman knows that courtship is more than flowers and charm—it’s about showing you, from day one, that you’re worth the effort. The wrong man will make excuses. The right one will make plans. And you, darling, will know exactly which one to choose.

With love, wit, and just enough sass to keep ‘em on their toes,

MaryNell 💋 (aka 🍯 Honey)

P.S. Life’s too short for half-measures and half-hearted men. If he can’t step up, step aside. 😉